Thursday, May 04, 2006

News Round-up

The fact that so many pundits are saying that Stephen Colbert's routine at the White House Press Association wasn't funny means that in actuality it was probably just funny enough. (1)

The fact that Moussaoui responded to his life sentence by shouting "America, you lose!" probably means he got the right sentence. (2)

The fact that so many people - legal and illegal immigrants alike, plus supporters - turned out en masse as a display of political forces kind of misses the point that none of those 11 million illegal immigrants can, um, legally vote. (3)

1. Admittedly, like any good satirist, Colbert was not, in fact, fall-over funny. It's called "saying it with a straight face," with Colbert the so-called "straight man." If he was all goofy, the President and anyone else offended could have just laughed and shrugged him off. Dude gave them a beat down by not doing it the easy way, and now he can go back to cable, happily martyred (if he so chooses)

2. This was one of the few good things to come out of the post 9/11-era. If Moussaoui had nothing to do with 9/11, he shouldn't be punished for it. And even if he did, he should be kept alive in solitary as one of the few people in custody with anything to do with 9/11, and therefore with any chance of illuminating just what might happen next. Then again, the guy's a total loon. The irony is that a bunch of other folks around the world who did have something to do with 9/11 will probably never stand trial, since they've been tortured beyond usefulness. What a stupid, stupid government, what with its stupid, stupid prosecutions and its stupid, stupid disregard for the power of truth over obnoxious and ineffective attempts at over-persuasion.

3. That said, if I were a politician, this is a fight I would want to stay very, very far away from. "Stealing" your way into this country in hopes of a better life is not the same as actually stealing money, or cars, or all the other flimsy analogies I've heard. As a whole, I bet illegal immigrants make very, very little money, relatively speaking, and of that little, much goes back to Mexico (or wherever). And Mexicans specifically are very, very hard working, a lot harder working than the average fat, stupid lazy American. Who, after all, is the real blight on health care/education/government/welfare. Not the 11 million immigrants, but the 270 million or so of the rest of us hypocritical and selfish losers.


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